Till death do us part

Marriage - some of us say it with an exclamation and well some like me say it with a sigh

Why???? Because we have all dragged our heavy feet down that road of heartache

Who ever said marriages are made in heaven were just not human. If you can’t keep a relationship, then what’s the guarantee of a marriage other than that handcuffs he slips on to your fingers and yours to him. The longer we stay single, the longer we put off marriage; because women become more aware of their rights, their freedom and their independence.

Let’s see, once you are married, you have all the uninvited guests of in-laws and relatives permanently parking themselves at your home and not to forget their own version of Dr Phil’s advise on how to live your life.

Would you be able to take fancy trips with your bunch of friends without having to call back every 15 minutes just to keep your spouse updated of your whereabouts? Would you not worry if your spouse said he’s having a karaoke session with his friends? Moving in together presents a whole new set of other problems. He doesn’t push the toothpaste from the end, he does not use a coaster, he does not lift the toilet seat and ESPN is on 24/7

A relationship is easier, you don’t like him, he doesn’t like you, it’s easy you call it quits. Cry buckets and engage in a male thrashing session with good ole girlfriends to get over him, burn his underwear and all his toiletries and sing the kumbaya and the heartache is over…well briefly.

But marriage….can you just walk out? There’s the papers, the family, the kids. Is there any assurance for a happy marriage? A self confessed feminist like me will say yes, women will work hard to keep the marriage going because we are fixers by nature; but what about the irresponsible men who just take things for granted?

In conclusion, marriage is an impending doom of a relationship. You have to be prepared financially, emotionally, physically (when you need to throw the blender at him) and ready for hard work to pull it off.

So, who’s ready to take the first plunge?

Natural or C-Section

Did you know the latest fad of giving birth is via C-Sec? For those singletons who didn’t know that, yes that’s the in thing these days. A dear friend of mine is 6 months along the family way and she has made up her mind to go into labour and push her baby out the au natural way.

Doctors these days are too lazy to be on call and therefore try to convince you that a C-Sec will just knock you out and get the job done in an hour

Her mom told her that doing a C-Sec denies you the very right to enjoy the one experience of motherhood, and I must agree. Isn’t our body built to withstand pain? Our body or specifically the vagina is able to expand to allow the child to slide its way out. Amazing?

Choosing natural child birth is trusting your body to have the confidence; knowing we have all the tools we need to give birth.

Let’s face it, when you have a child, you carry her for the next nine months going through morning sickness, pregnancy classes, the Lamaze breathing techniques, weird cravings, swelled legs, awful stretch marks, nausea and worse avoiding alcohol for the whole nine months!!!!

After all that torture, don't you want to go through the final pinnacle of pain (or pleasure)?

Knowing the child has come out into this world through your own efforts is ultimately pricelsss

So kudos to my friend and to all the courageous women out there who’s willing to P-U-S-H

Vanity is our downfall

You have a bad day, your boss is mad at you, you realize you got a letter form the IRS and your tax is due, the heater isn’t working this morning, you broke a heel and the worse thing to hit us all………………ran out of compact powder!!

Hell breaks loose; could things get any worse then not having something to apply on our faces before we head off to work? I admit, I am no Kate Moss or Gisele Bundchen but darn it I have every right to look fabulous each time I walk out the door.

Which brings me…what is our obsession? Every woman has a thing – lipsticks, high heels, handbags, eye shadows, skirts, knickers etc. There’s always something that makes a woman go weak in the knees, something that we cannot say no to, breaks all our defenses, forces us to plunge in and buy it!!

I have a thing too – sneakers! I wish I could buy up all Stan Smith’s series…..absolute fab!!

So what makes you go weak in the knee? Is it the MNG sale, the MAC’s autumn line, the latest CK’s perfume range? No matter what, all logic fails and we head over to the counter convincing ourselves we MUST get that dress else when the world is heading to its annihilation we’ve got nothing pretty to wear. It’s a wonder why men never get us!

Back then it was much easier

How many of us have changed since high school? I am not talking about the physical change. No one cares about how many kilos you have lost or what colour your hair is or when you last did waxing…save it honey

This is about an internal change. How I see the world and how the world sees me. How many of us can say the world sees me as I truly am? Then again, do we really wanna the show the world who we truly are?? Maybe not a good idea

I wonder why we always need something so bad and hurtful in our lives to change? It is always the loss of someone whom we love that pushes us to reexamine our lives and the decisions we have taken. There are two categories of people– those who spiral downwards and the ones who choose to cope with Prozac in such situations

I know friends who have lost their parent, it was the most life changing event for them. All of a sudden, they emerge more courageous then they had ever been. Can we ever cope with loss? You just pray hard that everyday is a better day and find the strength to push yourself when some days are hard.

How about a devastating breakup? Losing the person you love? Yes you do change, from declaring your undying love to them to secretly wishing they wake up one morning and find their genitals rotting away

Change is hard but it is necessary in order to survive. How many of us can look back on the days when we were only 17 and wondered if those same values could help us cope with our lives today? At that time, we were convinced we would end up marrying our very first bf and love was all that matters……lol the thought is hilarious 12 years later!

Back then all that mattered was getting good grades, the latest album from New Kids On The Block, Johnny Depp in 21 Jump Street, having our own clique, good allowances, dates, curfews, boyfriends and controlling parents.

Ok, some of us have still not come out of the controlling parents bit!

Surely, we can’t be talking about Jason Donovan, Nirvana and East 17 in an Asian Marketing Convention now can we?

Those were the days we laughed more and couldn’t wait to get out of school. Now, I wish I could crawl back to my sheltered life in school days. Never having to worry about bad bosses, crap salaries, annoying colleagues/friends, never having to be diplomatic, never needing to wear skirts or high heels

Yes….those were the days

Must resist desserts

While crash diets seem to be the in thing these days, can one really have control over one’s cravings?

Can you honestly stop yourself from a warm chocolate sundae? Say no to Tiramisu? Creamy cannoli, panna cotta, chocolate mousse, gulab jamun…..ok my housemate would surely say no to all of these but I know she can’t resist dark chocolates. So you see while we are obsessing over our waistline and praying our weighing scale will not tip over, the evil pastry chefs have a different agenda altogether for us…damn those people!

Desserts used to be optional but as time progressed; desserts became a must have during dinners or lunch. Skip the appetizers but always leave room for desserts, sounds familiar?

Then to delude ourselves, we indulge in low caloried ice cream or a diet coke or a low fat yoghurt thinking we can kill 2 birds with 1 stone. Sure these eases our conscious of not having the undesirable muffin forming on our waist line but truly is it the real thing? Can a low fat chocolate cake give you the necessary kick of endorphins or as they say a substitute to great sex?

One can only wonder

Joining the club

Why do people write blogs? At first it seemed silly at the thought of washings one’s dirty linen in public but then I discovered that not all blogs are self absorbing sordid tales of one’s sorrows but there’s a whole plethora of blogs out there ranging from food, clothes, movies, politics, current affairs, health and yes sex!

I have a few friends who have blogs of their own and other blogs that I read diligently every morning. One of them being Perez Hilton and Go Fug Yourself, hei what can I say? I’m a sucker for gossips and any dirt that can be dished out on someone.

So while sitting here ‘productively at work’, my mind wonders….hmmm what will I write? Should I narrow it down to a particular genre or should I break all inhibitions and write about everything and anything under the sun….obviously the latter is more appealing

So here am I, losing my virginity into the blogger’s world.